sunday afternoon

November 2, 2008

just past 3 on a sunday afternoon, i can hear the dryer tumbling clothing. i can see the shadows of maple tree leaves dancing on a white cabinet door below the counter.

today i realized my house is very yin. not so yang.  and i happen to quite like it that way. it’s a very peaceful place to be. delightful is how i would describe my home. i can hear the slight trickle of water near my front door, from the tall fountain in the career (KAN) area of my home.

i’m not terribly motivated when I’m at home. i am very peaceful here. it’s a great place to relax. i also notice that when I pick stuff up, put it away, clean up, take out the trash, get rid of things i don’t want or need, then the whole place takes on new life.

when i’m a bit unmotivated, if i decide to throw out or get rid of 10 items, it starts something, it starts a small trickle of energy into me. suddenly things start getting done, things start getting cleaned up, and I feel like I have more energy and am happier.

there’s no question that you can tell how i’m feeling by my surroundings. the neater and cleaner it is, the more calm I become. when there is stuff strewn about everywhere, you can pretty much guess that there’s a jumble of stuff in me that i’m not quite sure what to do with.

today, i folded all the kitchen towels and rags in my laundry room. i adjusted a shelf in the laundry room so that all the paper towels would fit neatly in there. this morning i started out with a nice hike that really made my lungs work. when i came back home it was a bit messy, from my return from india. i’m still cleaning up, putting away, and processing everything from my trip to mumbai (bombay), goa and pune.

i found that when i was in india had a hard time moving my energy, attention and focus from the ugly things to the nice things. i found it so frustrating to see garbage everywhere, instead of being able to put my energy into seeing the great relationships that people have and the colorful life there, i kept being drawn to looking at things that depressed me.

i’ve learned that the places i see beauty most are the places with the fewest people. somehow the scenery of the land without bulidings and people is so much more magnificent to me. i also came to appreciate how much i love being an american. so many of us have no idea what an incredible place we live in. we live in a country where anything is possible and where so many people have achieved so many things. i appreciate the values in our society greatly.

i also hope that as time goes by, i can begin to see beauty in chaos. for now, order, organization and pragmatism are what make me feel most at peace and well with the world. on that note, i’ll go start a new load of laundry, then fold and neatly put away the belongings i’m so fortunate to own.